Dreaming

I might be a dreamer. I've always been a day dreamer. It's something I inherited from my mother. I don't know if I'm superstitious, but I swear if I imagine something happening, well then I know it won't happen. At least not in that way. It's one thing I can always count on. It feels like I might be saying, "my dreams don't come true" but that isn't it...because they can and do...just maybe not how I planned.

I don't have a lot of time for dreaming these days. A toddler and household to do's keep my mind pretty occupied. I don't think about what I want super often. I'm realizing it's important to do things I enjoy and/or want to do...because it keeps me sane, and our house happy :) Every mom needs time to develop herself outside of her role as "mother". [this is not something I am good at doing]

I'm rambling. Ok. So the purpose of this post: I have an idea. I have something I think about doing...I guess you could call it a dream. We went to this cute little cafe place in Indiana a few years ago. I don't even know if you'd call it a cafe...but that's the closest word I've got. Ever since then I've dreamed about opening a place just like that one. I can't explain it well. I think about what it would look like and the type of food that would be available and where (or if) it would be successful. Would people think it was as cool an idea as I did? Or would it just flop? But here's the thing...I don't know anything about this kind of stuff. I don't know anything about owning my own business or the food industry (or even cooking for that matter) or how to run a place like that and be successful and I'm not great at decorating. But I think about how great it would be to open this place. There is a big part of me that thinks I would just love it. Anytime I see a store front for sale/lease that matches the aesthetic in my head I can't stop myself from imagining what it would be like and if I could do it...

And then I shut myself down. I've imagined it...so it won't happen. And it's not the right time in my life. And there is no way I could attempt something like that. And it would be so much time/effort. And I couldn't justify wasting the money if it didn't work...

But I still think about it...and silently tell myself that maybe
someday it could happen. Maybe.

I can't help but think this dream isn't going to fade away any time soon. And I have no idea what to do about that.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

From where I lay

Today I was laying on the grass while Carter played in the dirt. I was looking up at the beautiful blue sky, relishing the last days of summer...so I took this picture



Then Carter came over and said "Cheese" so I switched cameras to take a picture of us together. I took one, but his head was far away from mine, so I told him to move closer. I took another picture and called it good. The sun was in my eyes, but the pictures looked ok.

I just looked at the pictures and couldn't stop laughing!





We look awful! Seriously? I thought these were good?? Usually it goes more like this...(taken while posting this)


I was almost too embarrassed to post those, but it made me laugh so hard I had to share!

That moment when you realize it's been over two months since you blogged last

And you know there is no way to catch up. And you feel guilty for not blogging more because these are the times in your life you are going to want to remember. But everything is happening so fast and you can't even remember what you did yesterday...

The summer has been great so far. We have been fairly busy...and I didn't blog about some pretty key things...like the 4th of July, Bear Lake, our 5 year anniversary (say what?) and Carter's 2nd birthday (can't believe that came and went so quickly). All of those things happened in a two week period... It's hard for me to skip over that kind of stuff, so then I just don't write at all. But I'm going to try (cross your fingers) to start fresh.

As of today, I have two months until baby girl comes. She still doesn't have a name...nothing seems to fit just right. I'm getting super excited and ready to hold her. I feel like October couldn't come fast enough. Except that I don't want summer to end, and I get super overwhelmed thinking of everything I still need to get done before she arrives!

Carter is well, he is two. He is still a little string bean, but he is moving up on the weight charts so that is good. He likes to eat straight butter and I hate to admit I let him in an effort to fatten him up. He is pretty smart. He speaks in full sentences when he wants to and can "read" some of his favorite books. For the most part he is so easy going. Seriously. He is snuggly and sweet. He even shares well (most of the time). Lately he has been obsessed with the temple and looking at pictures of the temple and he will randomly bring up the fact that mommy and daddy were married in the temple. To say that I love him is an understatement.

Shawn is busy. So so busy. With work and scouts and house projects and hobbies and family time. He never gets a break. I probably don't help either...some things are getting harder to do (the belly just gets in the way!) and so he willingly steps up in those areas too. He works so hard to take care of us. I'm so glad we are married. I can't believe it's been 5 years...I'm looking forward to the rest of our lives. Even though kid stuff might be consuming me right now, he will always be my number one. He is my best friend. And I promise, I'd go insane without him.

That's all I've got for now...